Back to the Basics

Saturday, April 3, 2021

Being in the habit of moving every 2-3 years, I could always count on my "new life chapter" as a break because it's the time frame I'd have the least amount of responsibility or commitment. Here we are 3 years later and I don't intend to leave. I've planted some roots. But what do you do when you're not forced to slow down? When you're not forced to relax. 

Unfortunately, due to some health concerns and just some life events that have happened in the last month, I've been forced to really think - What belongs in my life? What can I shed? I want to hold onto something for as long as possible, even if it has been rotting in my hands.

But when I thought of what things should go and what should stay, one I grappled with the longest is my Coaching business. I have been serving as a Life/Career Coach for 14 years, but 4 years as my own business. I have worked with over 500 clients as of this January ranging from professional athletes, fashion designers putting their lines into NYFW, politicians, pageant titleholders, and anything under the creative sun. This life even inspired me to bring my podcast dream out of hibernation. Life has changed and so have my priorities. When I was single, or when Aaron worked longer nights, I had no issue doing resumes, mock interviews, and cover letters late into the night or on my Lunch breaks on Wednesdays. But now? I just want to focus on my health, my marriage, and the other responsibilities that are more long term.

This really hurts. 14 years of my life, I have been cultivating relationships with people I have become friends with, they're not just clients. I've danced at their weddings, held their babies, watched them go through the darkest parts of their life and career transitions as well as their peaks. 

I've spent almost half of my life Coaching. It's what helped me buy plane tickets home, that extra tank of gas at the end of a long pay period. It even helped pay off my old car 2 years earlier than expected. This side hustle has held me physically together and emotionally, it has been part of my identity for so long. 

But in this season, I hear God calling me back to the basics. The fundamental things that make me whole, and a few, yes just a FEW things that are fun and meaningful. For someone like me, for people like me. We want to think we can do it all and all at once, but we can't. I can't. Admitting that in this season of life is SO difficult. Unfortunately it took a series of events for me to even make this decision to say goodbye for now to Coaching. I was nervous and have a lot of imposter syndrome thinking - But what if I want to come back? Will my clients still be there? Will new ones think I am relevant? And honestly, it doesn't matter. I have become more drawn to the idea and action of reinventing myself. I've done it more than a dozen of times, and I am sure will continue as I gain more time on this earth.

My life has changed dramatically in the last 3 years, and who knows where life will take me (us) next. All I know is that I plan to focus on the basics...Plus the things I know I am meant to carry out 2021 in.

As I go back to the Basics, that includes more writing, more journaling. All the things that make me whole.

I sent an email to my clients - Thank you so much for allowing me into your lives. When I started coaching, I wanted to impact people's transitions, reminding folks that transitions are supposed to be wild, unsettling, and makes you feel like you don't know how to get from point A to B. I loved the getting "unstuck" part of the journey they were on.

But it's time to focus on my own journey. This feels good, this feels peaceful.

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